Festival Tips 005 – Mating Season

Festival Tips 005 – Mating Season


Festival Tips 005 - Mating Season

Ladies, how many times have you and your friends had to vacate a spot because some goofball won’t stop attempting to dance with you? The answer is probably too many!

The Situation: Missy is dancing with her friends to some of that techno music. Cody is in the crowd close, but not that close, to Missy, also dancing to said techno music. Those kids and their damn techno music. Anyways, Cody notices that Missy is looking kinda hot and wants to dance with her. So, he starts creeping his way through the crowd towards her, like a cheetah stalking a gazelle, perhaps.

He finally gets pretty close to her and starts trying to make eye contact and get behind her. Each time Cody gets closer or makes eye contact, Missy either gives him a WTFBRO? look or moves further away. Cody either DGAFs or has some sort of learning disorder and keeps getting closer regardless of all the bad signals.

Finally Cody the cheetah attacks and tries to dance with Missy. Her response is exactly what a gazelle getting attacked by a cheetah would look like. She bucks him off, gives him a bitchy look, and moves a few feet away. For whatever reason Cody continues following her so she eventually has to leave the spot altogether.

The Tip: Guys, for a lot of us, one of the best parts about going to shows is meeting and dancing with new women. Figuring out which ones are in the market to be courted can be rough, and you’re probably going to get rejected many more times than you’re accepted. The trick to lowering that ratio is testing the water a little bit before jumping in, so to speak.

Don’t jump straight on or at girls in the crowd unless you have some sort of mind reading ability and know they want it. Instead try making your way near to her and kicking it there for a bit. Dance, party, bullshit — do whatever. Just make sure she can see you, and you can see her. After a while try and make eye contact, exchange smiles, or get some kind indication that she might be feeling you. If she does, hopefully you know what to do from there.

Play it right and you could end like the couple bangin’ on the dance floor.

Protip for Dudes: Make eye contact, exchange smiles and check her body language before you engage.

Protip for Ladies: Be nice when rejecting dudes, and use friend-zoned guy friends as fake boyfriends in a sitch.